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Location: Indore, (MP), India

It's the toughest job to define self...

Friday, June 25, 2004

Employer's Lingo

"COMPETITIVE SALARY" : We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.

"JOIN OUR FAST-PACED TEAM": We have no time to train you.

"CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE" : We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up well,a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings.

"MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED" : You'll be six months behind schedule on your first day.

"SOME OVERTIME REQUIRED" : Some time each night and some time each weekend.

"DUTIES WILL VARY": Anyone in the office can boss you around.

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL": We have no quality control.

"CAREER-MINDED" : Female Applicants must be childless (and remain that way).

"APPLY IN PERSON": If you're old, fat or ugly you'll be told the position has been filled.

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE": We've filled the job; our call for resumes is just a legal formality.

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE": You'll need it to replace three people who just left.

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST" : You're walking into a company in perpetual
chaos.

"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS": You'll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS" : Management communicates, you listen, figure out
what they want and do it.

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